- Member for
- 4 years 7 months
Are you the global president? In other words, do you know more things than anyone else in the world? If not, there will be times when you need to just get out of the way.
Now that I’m getting a little more age on me, I can’t help but reflect upon past presidential elections and compare them to the present day. And do you know what? It’s really scary. In the past, there was usually at least one candidate that represented some hope. But that’s not really the case today.
“That’s not fair!” Have you ever said that? Sure you have. But the real question is why? Did you, for some reason, think that life was going to be fair? Well, in case you’re still thinking that way, let me be the first to tell you, it’s not. In fact, it can be very unfair. Just ask the University of North Carolina’s men’s basketball team. They had less than 5 seconds to play defense in the NCAA title game Monday evening, and lost to Villanova on a last second 3-point shot by Villanova’s Kris Jenkins.
Have you ever had someone dominate your life for a few days? I have. His name is Mr. Globin: First name Hemo. What does he do for a living? He is the protein molecule in your red blood cells and carries oxygen from your lungs to your body’s tissues and returns carbon dioxide from the tissues back to your lungs.
Do you know that it normally takes you about seven minutes to fall asleep? Of course that’s if you are average. Are you average? I hate average. According to Mr. Dictionary, average is a number expressing the central or typical value in a set of data, in particular the mode, median or the mean, which is calculated by dividing the sum of the values in the set by their number. In other words, despite the fact that it has one of the longest definitions in the world, average means boring and I’m guessing that the person who wrote the above definition is really boring.
Let’s say that you are really bored, so just for fun you decide to do the dumbest thing you can think of doing, today. What would it be? Would you stand on the tracks and, at the last minute, dive out of the way of a speeding train? Would you eat 62 pancakes while watching presidential election coverage from sunup to sundown? Or would you fly to Las Vegas and marry your best friend’s former cheating wife? Whatever the case, each of the above would easily qualify as being ill-advised.
According to Mr. Dictionary, a scam is a dishonest scheme or a fraud. It is a swindle or a stratagem for gain and it might be something to pay particular attention to during this election year. The most notable scams in my lifetime are the supposed facts surrounding the murders of John F. Kennedy, Robert F. Kennedy and Martin Luther King Jr. We are asked to believe a lone gunman theory in each case, despite there being an overabundance of contradictions. Not to mention Watergate and now the exorbitant costs of higher education.
Do you like to gamble? I don’t. Nor do I particularly like to play cards, which is probably one of the big reasons why I don’t like to gamble. In fact, I go to the National Finals Rodeo in Las Vegas in early December almost every year. Yet, I never pull a lever on a slot machine. Nor do I touch a deck of cards, roll a pair of dice or spin any wheels. I must be, for casino owners, the “posterboy” for exactly who they’d least like to see walk through their doors.
Did you know that North Dakota and South Dakota became a state on the very same day? It’s true. Fact is, each state fought hard to be first, but U.S. President Rutherford B. Hayes pulled a quick one that day in 1889. He shuffled papers and, just by luck, he signed the North Dakota documents first, making South Dakota the second fiddle, the bridesmaid instead of the bride, and runner-up instead of champion.
Are there certain smells that you love and others that you don’t? At one time, I used to love the sweet smell of my grandfather’s pipe. But I hated the odor of incense and what used to be called “old lady’s perfume.” And then there are those things that I think smell good that probably don’t. For example, when I drive down the highway and am suddenly confronted with a construction stoppage, I find that I like the smell of the asphalt being laid down.