Belfield divided as local farmer vandalizes water tower for wife

BELFIELD, N.D. — The quiet streets and friendly locals of Belfield were rocked last night by news that the water tower in town had been vandalized. According to the Stark County Sheriff’s Office, the tower was painted with green paint in what appears to be a 10-foot heart with smaller lettering.

Sheriff Corey Lee said his department sprang into action, launching a full investigation to uncover the culprits behind the brazen act of vandalism. Deputies located two eyewitnesses within hours of the incident who reported that they saw a figure scaling the water tower late the night prior.

After hours of tireless detective work, the Sheriff’s Office announced this morning that they had identified a suspect. Local farmer Billy Bob, who had apparently painted the heart as a tribute to his wife Charlene, was issued a citation for damaging property.

In an exclusive interview with The Dickinson Press, Billy Bob shared his motivations behind the act noting he intended the act to be a romantic gesture to his wife.

“We were farm kids who had met in high school in the '60s,” he said. “I have to admit, I was pretty stupid to do something like that. I guess I only got the courage to do it after a six-pack of Hamm's. But now that I see the damage I caused, I really regret it.”

Billy Bob has admitted to having climbed to the top of the water tower and painted the heart in John Deere green, with the words, "Billy Bob loves Charlene" in letters three-foot high.

Speaking on the incident and the artistic flair in the message, Charlene said that it, “looked good.”

The Dickinson Press spoke to multiple Belfield area residents for their reactions to the vandalism, and the whole town seems in agreement.

“The boy should have used red,” one resident said, echoing the sentiments of the entire town.

As news of Billy Bob's romantic gesture has spread throughout the town, residents are said to be divided over whether he should be hailed as a romantic hero or punished for his vandalism.

One thing is for sure in the incident, however, today is April 1st.

Editor's Note: This article is a work of satire, published in the spirit of April Fools' Day and based on the Joe Diffie song, “John Deere Green”. The events described in the article are entirely fictional and should not be taken as real. We hope you enjoyed this lighthearted piece and wish you a happy April Fools' Day!